So sad: http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/wireStory?id=522462

[Thanks to tonycollins for “breaking” the bad news.]

The Washington Post’s Style Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are this year’s winners:

1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it.

8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon: It’s like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it’s like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consumming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you’re eating.

And the pick of the literature:

18. Ignoranus: A person who’s both stupid and an asshole.

Happy Monday. It’s gloomy today, and a bit on the chilly side. At least there’s no snow. Not yet.

Yet another free-lance project is in my midst. Hooray!

I am love-love-loving my mornings at the Y. I ran/walked this morning for an hour. My iPod, however, couldn’t keep up. The battery died about 30 minutes into my workout. But that’s my fault. I forgot to recharge The Music Man last night before bed. Note to self: Charge iPod before next trip to the Y.

Matthew and I rented “Something’s Gotta Give” last night. I didn’t stay awake until the end. Anyone know how it finishes? Does she wind up with Keanu or Jack?

I wish I would’ve went to the store over the weekend. Yogurt sounds good right about now.

I recently finished the books “Life of Pi” and “In the Land of Second Chances.” Both were great reads, although I preferred the former a bit more. I have a copy of “Blue Shoe” by Anne Lamott, but I think I may temporarily shelve that title. I’m in the mood for a murder mystery.

Time to make some magic of the journalistic kind. Enjoy your day.

http://abcnews.go.com/WNT/Entertainment/story?id=513522&page=1

I wish I had a dime every time someone in the last week has tried to start a useless, meaningless and time-wasting conversation with me, when clearly I’m trying to work.

In the great tradition of Bar Hag, I begin.

Hello, babies.

It’s raining in Omaha. I’ve heard the rain may turn to snow this afternoon, but I’m not convinced. It’s pretty warm for snow today, even in Omaha.

This morning was day two of my YMCA adventure. Yes, I joined the Y. I briskly walk/slowly jog for one hour (about 4 miles). My legs and feet are sore, and I’ve developed a lovely pair of blisters on the back of my ankles. But I feel great! I decided to jumpstart my exercise routine to get in shape, not to lose weight. If I drop a few pounds, great. If my clothes become a bit baggy, that’s OK, too. But my main goal is to get healthy and stay healthy. I’m trying to be more conscious of my eating habits, as well.

Matthew had a spot-on analogy when describing the Grammy Awards: It’s like a bunch of popular kids in high school, throwing a party for themselves and only inviting the cool kids. This is one of the first years where I realized what a joke the Grammy Awards are. There are SO MANY OTHER artists in the past year who are leaps and bounds better than the crap that’s paid, um, excuse me, played on the radio. Eck.

My job search continues. I’m slowly losing hope.

These beauties arrived at work yesterday morning around 10. As beautiful as they look in the photo, it doesn’t do them justice.

Even though I’m a day late: Happy Valentine’s Day :-)

Thanks, Matthew!

So it’s me and Todd Baechle (of the Faint), chatting on the phone last night. I’m working on an article and needed a few quotes from him.

The interview goes fantastic. I ask good questions. He gives good answers.

And as I’m wrapping things up, I let the fan side of me slip out a bit too much.

“Keep up the good work!”

I’m an idiot.

That’s the best I could do?

An aside: Todd is awesome. He answered my questions beautifully with humor, too :-)

From Ryan Adams’ concert last November. [Thanks to the boys at One Percent Productions for this little beauty.]

In the past few days, I’ve written so many words, strung together so many sentences, that I’m literally unable to stop. In the shower, while eating a bowl of cereal or (gasp!) clipping my toenails, I’m creating ways to describe what I’m doing.

It’s odd, I know. For whatever reason, the “off” switch in my brain isn’t functioning as it should.

Ohm.